WAKE UP from ourselves.

“Come to me, all who are laden, and I will give you rest.”
Jesus promises to lift the heavy burdens you’re carrying
if you will just come to Him. matthew 11:28

from where i started to where i am today
the journey has been long and tiring
It’s not been easy

tired with luck
tired with hard work
tired with destiny too
but nothing worked for me.
it’s not been an easy journey.

she is strong
we have a wonderful family.
i hope you regret what you're doing.
i'm so angry sometimes.

here is the thing i am not an angry person
i mostly get myself screwed over
because i see the good in people
i let them have chances.

but you sir...
you have no chances.
i am not going to get my hopes up.

discernment is often overlooked…
just like all the crap
and the temptations we allow
in our minds and hearts.

getting past ourselves, stripping our apathy
[even if its apathy towards one you love]
and returning to the desires of
God’s heart only can we find fulfillment.
and wake up from ourselves

some people don't get that
there are better people worth my time
and my wishes.
all i am here for is her.

i feel like i am selfish
i feel like i take this really personally.
but he hurt the people i care about most.
he is someone i care more about than others
that is why this is difficult.
if things get better.
don't expect me to come around.
you will get a nice front but it will take a long time.
but honestly not getting hopeful.

i am so lucky to have bradley
he is understanding and cares.
and gets me and gets what i am going through.
i feel like when i come to write all i can think about is the bad.
its because i don't let it out all the time.

each day is a new development
a new disappointment
i am tired of this journey
and ready for a new one to start.

Create in me a clean heart,
o God and renew a right spirit within me.- Psalm 51:10


[Dec.12th 2008/ 9:05am]