Thursday, October 22, 2009

part 2

this is unlike any relationship stuff.
or friendship stuff.
this is real.
this is messed up.

mornings are hard.
i think of her waking up
and being sad.

so dedicated.
so loving.
you don't deserve her.
she doesn't deserve this.

i don't want to go to thanksgiving.
which sucks i love thanksgiving.
family and good food.

i might cry when i see you
out of anger
and sadness
it's so new
it's so fresh

i can think of a million harsh words i
could throw your direction.
but you know them already and me
saying them wouldn't phase you.
maybe if my dad said them. but not me.

when she is sad at night or during the day
and can't do anything but cry or want to go home...
i will be there for her. i will be someone she can trust.

this is something you will never see.
sometimes i just need to vent.
my heart is hurt.
i don't want to cry any more when no one's looking.

i hope you prove me wrong.
well i guess you already did.. ha [not a funny joke]
i am preparing myself for the worst
but hoping that doesn't happen.

it's weird how you think you know someone.
this still blows my mind.

there are a few people who know.
thanks for being there for me.
this is emotionally draining

[Nov.20th 2008/9:20am]

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